It's atomicgarden because that was one of my favorite Bad Religion song six years ago (I always forget but my LiveJournal's birthday is 4/20..). This was back when LiveJournals were invite or pay only, so I had been on deadjournal where my name was Josiah. I moved over to livejournal but Josiah was taken, so I just went with atomicgarden.
2. My name is _____ because ______.
My first name is Josiah because Zachary was taken. True story. My parents decided to name me Zachary, went out to eat at a restaurant where their friend was chef, and he came to their table and announced: "We just had a baby! We named him Zachary!" My parents probably said "Congratulations!" but inside they were saying "FUCK!" I don't actually know why they didn't just name me Zachary anyway, but the average class size in Provincetown was about 20, so it was nice that they didn't. Plus I ended up being best friends with Zach for a while, so that would have been weird.
My middle name is Christian because it's my mom's last name.
3. My journal is titled ____ because ____.
"the only broken hearted loser you'll ever need" because... It's a very catchy song off of Brand New's first album.. I like it a lot. I wrote it there a few years ago, before the masses had started calling anything that could be perceived as "whiny" Emo.
4. My friends page is called ____ because ____.
"our policy is: if you're not entirely satisfied, I hate you" It's a quote from Futurama. I liked it.
Plans for the upcoming week +a few days Friday the 11th: Get out of class, get in Charle's car, drive home, interview parents about their business for class, collect some small trees, drive home. If it's not too late, go to Hallowed Ground or other piercing studio and get lip pierced. Saturday the 12th: if my lip isn't already pierced, get it pierced. Go to Gorham to see two bands with bad names but cool members (Mace Cove and Arms Against a Sea). Sunday the 13th: assemble trees and other parts into a sculpture in which a marble moves for over a minute before coming to a stop. Monday the 14th: find a way to get that sculpture to Gorham and back. Wednesday the 16th: get a room for the first semester next year. Saturday the 19th: drive to Bowdoinham in Charle's car, retrieve my car without my parents noticing I have a piece of metal protruding from my lip, drive to Cambridge, MA, watch Piebald play for one of the last times ever, drive to Dedham, sleep in Abby's basement. Sunday the 20th: awaken, drive back to Bowdoinham, retrieve Charle's car, drive back to Portland.
Man, I haven't posted in a while. What's been going on: I have a girlfriend. I'm driving for my first mini-road trip tomorrow with The Mose to visit Orono tomorrow. My pillow melted the other night.
I just finished rewiring my guitar. My LTD EC-1000 is now custom wired with a kill switch, pickup blend pot, and a series/parallel switch for my bridge pickup after about 3 hours slouching over it with a soldering iron. The signal gets through the way it's supposed to, but I haven't restrung it yet to hear how it sounds.
1. Go to Career Cruising, www.careercruising.com 2. Put in Username: eths60204 and Password: wildkit. 3. Take their "Career Matchmaker" questions. 4. Post the results 5. Put the careers you have seriously considered in italics, and the careers in which you have worked/do work in bold.
1. Optometrist 2. Special Effects Technician 3. Industrial Designer 4. Interior Designer [that's what they told my mom to do and sometimes she wishes she had] 5. Exhibit Designer 6. Potter [I'm not sure I'm hairy enough. HAHA. Shut up, you were thinking it too] 7. Craftsperson 8. Fashion Designer 9. Animator 10. Actor 11. Engineering Tech 12. Lighting Technician 13. Sprinkler System Installer 14. Electrical Engineer 15. Mechanical Engineering Tech 16. Physicist 17. Aerospace Engineer 18. Mechanical Engineer 19. Stuntperson 20. Dancer [haha] 21. Set Designer 22. Costume Designer 23. Image Consultant 24. Computer Animator 25. Artist 26. Graphic Designer 27. Comedian 28. Art Director 29. Professional Athlete 30. Singer 31. Musician 32. Medical Illustrator 33. Composer 34. Interior Decorator 35. Website Designer 36. Hospital Service Worker 37. Casting Director 38. Astronaut [YESSSSS] 39. Steamfitter 40. Makeup Artist
Blarg. I've been working on my guitar all night. It's been a little frustrating. My soldering iron is halfway dead, which makes taking everything apart tedious as hell. I'm out of solder. And it turns out, for some reason, the neck pickup is a 2 conductor wiring setup. Why would they put that in a modern guitar, if 4 conductor is the same price? And the push/pull pot I bought has metric threading or something that wont fit through the hole.
So: I'm going to go off in search of a new push/pull pot over the next week, and go buy solder and a new soldering iron tomorrow. Instead of coil tapping both pickups, I'll just make it a series/parallel switch for the bridge pickup. I want to be excited to finally be modding my guitar, but it's turning into an annoyance.
Its snowed sooo much over the past few weeks, now all of a sudden it's raining. Hmmm.
For some reason USM Payroll either hates me or loves to see me, because two years in a row I simply haven't been entered in their systems, so I have to go in and say "hey... um... I'd like to be able to enter my time, kthanks." Then I sit around for a half hour, and I get a huge paycheck later. Last night of work of the year, not counting any jobs I may help my parents out with over break
Grades for three of my classes have been posted:
Music Theory III - A College doesn't have A+ for some reason. Laaame.
Writing - Rock & Roll Culture: A-
Art History: B- This was by far my worst class. This grade surprised and pleased me to see.
Going home tomorrow morning. Its making me slightly anxious. Hopefully I wont fight with my mom much, and the mess in my old room wont depress or opress me.
I shut my hand in my straightening iron last night. Basically I'm awesome.
I'm wondering if it's the fact that its only a first degree burn, the location, or the fact that it was accidental that makes it a lot more irritating than my brand was.
OH YEAH! I totally forgot to post the schematic for my guitar wiring plan I drew up I'm not really sure why I'm raping all your friend page layouts, no one will know how to read this. I guess I'm just a bit proud of myself for figuring it all out finally. What will it do you ask? The pickup selector is going to function as a kill switch. The bridge volume control will be a universal volume control. The middle control is being replaced with a blend switch. The tone switch is having a push pull function added so it'll function as a coil tap switch.
things to do this week: get stuff sorted out so I can get my paychecks think of idea's for more stupid comics wash sheets work up the nerve to talk to cute-MECA-girl
I forgot my shampoo when I went into the shower earlier today. Then I straightened my hair. Blarg. It's kind of gross right now. Hopefully it'll magically become less gross over a short time. Also, Kevin turned off the light while I was in the shower.
I'm thinking of getting my septum pierced. Paige says my strong point is my jaw and it'll take focus away. Charle and Chelsea think I'll look funny.
I'm having a good day. Last night Nora came over and her, Chelsea, Charle and I got nice and drunk. It's kind of funny that I always have groups of girls trying to force me out of my clothes, but its usually to draw on my belly or look at the hole in my chest. Nora asked Chelsea to have sex with her while her boyfriend watched. I think Chelsea may have been a little traumatized.
I walked Nora home and she couldn't walk straight, which was blowing my mind because she had three drinks, because that used to be nothing to her. We agreed that she's basically officially my unofficial older little sister. And that we need to be each other's best man. Which just means I need to find a girl even more, just so I can make Nora wear a tux. I wuv my older little sister. and to make things a little more weird, if we end up 35 and both unattached we're getting married.
I got to hang out with Thursday (Nora's cat, my cats' mom).
I got to music theory class early today and my professor was checking his facebook and wearing designer looking jeans and then talked about his myspace. Jeez, he's like an older version of me almost.
The older woman from my class brought her [I assume] daughter to class. She looked like Macaulay Culkin as a girl. She was uncommonly adorable for a white girl, looking through a piece of paper rolled into a telescope and smiling us.
I walked home through the park and stopped at the fountains. It's a beautiful day. I knelt down to pet a huge dragonfly, sitting very still with its tail in the water. Wonder what it was doing.
While I hesitate to call Portland a real city, City Life is agreeing with me. There's always something to make me smile. Like the guy the other day riding his bike with a constant look of shock on his face wearing an aloha shirt the other day. Or the tail of an airplane Charle and I found on a patio last night. Or the bulldog that noticed me walking by and tried following me with a big goofy bulldog grin.
Your results: You are Data
Data
83%
Deanna Troi
75%
Geordi LaForge
70%
Will Riker
70%
Mr. Sulu
60%
Uhura
55%
Jean-Luc Picard
55%
James T. Kirk (Captain)
50%
Mr. Scott
50%
Worf
50%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)
50%
Beverly Crusher
45%
Spock
35%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)
25%
Chekov
25%
Even though you are a genius you are always striving to be better.
I am a subtle flavour, quiet and polite, gentle, almost ambient. My presence in crowds will often go unnoticed. Best not to spill me on your clothes though, I can leave a nasty stain. What Flavour Are You?
You know the type that you talk to for three minutes and you already start falling in love with? Oh man. Charle was not exagerating when she said she wanted to marry Alison from ResLife. It also probably isn't an exageration to say she has the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. Long story short I'm giddy like some sort of schoolgirl or something She's my new boss' boss. So my new mission is to attempt to not melt in her presence.
talking to charle me: http://www.radiomaru.com/drawings/2003/very_cold_lips.jpg her: LESBIANS! her: i like lesbians me: so do I. me: so do I. her: yeah, but you dant have a chance with them me: I wouldn't say that me: I dated a lesbian once her: that doesn't count because she hadnt come out yet me: still her: and wasnt attractive me: stiiiilll
So I got my license earlier. Which meant I woke up early. So I was tired. So I took a nap. When I woke up Gilmore Girls was on. I remember when I used to watch that show all the time. Dude, Lane's band plays ska? Sebastian Bach was playing a Rancid cover.
For some reason I keep attracting girls with pit hair...
But here's a message I got the other day from a girl who appears to shave her armpits.
If you were a real person, in my daily life, I would be so instantly attracted to you that I would be too frightened to speak to you. Conversely if you said anything to me, I would become so awkward that I would have to excuse myself. We would probably never speak again and you would think that it was strange to meet someone that was so drawn in by your goodwill sweaters and enormous eyes that all her words became garbled and meaningless. Which is even more ironic, as I like to think that words are my only real gift.
I went to see Streetlight Manifesto, Reel Big Fish, and Less Than Jake last night. I feel like I'm getting old or something, but these days when I see a band I feel no need to be right up front, and I just want to sit and watch the band play, or dance with my friends if it's music we can dance to. ( Boring show recap in the cut )
I hate the guys at shows who don't wear shirts in the pit. First, I really hate that feeling as you run into them and your arm slips along their sweaty back. blech. And look, I know you're hot, but here's a fact about cotton, it absorbs moisture, which will then evaporate and cool you off. And here's another thing about cotton, it absorbs moisture, so your sweat stays on you. When you're running around half naked in the pit it's like saying "I DON'T WANT MY SWEAT ANYMORE! YOU TAKE IT!" and that's just nasty. And what ever happened to common courtesy and being polite? If you're trying to get through the crowd, the proper way to do so is not to just ram right into people. You could try slipping between them, or - if it's not too loud - saying "excuse me" or "pardon me" or "can I get by?" and no, saying "WATCH OUT" with a nasty tone is not an acceptable substitute.
Continuing on the topic of bands, my band has decided to finally just go with only having three members (i.e. we're unable to find a second guitarist) and thus are planning on working on new material, more in the vain of dance-punk/art-punk/post-punk and other stuff that has punk in the name but isn't actually punk at all. Following this decision I have decided to rewire my guitar, removing the current pickup selector toggle switch, replacing a volume pot with a pickup blend pot and installing a push/pull pot for coil tapping. I'm haven't decided if I want to tap the pickups separately, or if I want one switch to control both. I also haven't decided what to do with the current pickup selector switch.
I went to the dentist the other day, and my hygienist and dentist noticed my tattoo. I'm wondering if this is going to be how my mom hears about it. She's sort of friends with the receptionist, and even if she doesn't tell her I'm wondering if my mom will go in and she'll be having her teeth cleaned and hear the sentence "so that tattoo your son has, that's wild!"
Also, the dentist said "well, it's a lot better than a tongue ring" and went on to tell the story of a girl who's gums were suffering, and my hygienist said somewhat apologetically "well who knows, maybe that's next." This prompted two thoughts: a) "well actually..." and b) "ugggh, I hate it when people say 'tongue ring.'" I've never even seen anyone wearing a ring in their tongue piercing.
I've just had what I suspect to be my best and most humorous idea for a band name ever: JOHNNY PLASTIC AND THE OH NOES
I'm not just posting this here so you think I'm brilliant, it's also because having published my idea somewhere it now belongs to me. It's said: "Ideas are vulnerable As soon as you say your idea out loud Then it can go and live on its own And you will miss it oh so much And you will wait for it’s return And you will wish it were your own But ideas that left never come back home" but U.S. copyright law disagrees. My point being: Johnny Plastic and The Oh Noes (c) Josiah Robinson 2007
Now I need to either form this band (I would play bass) or write a comic containing a band by that name.
Boys Night Out: "(Just Once) Lets Do Something Different"
]
Last week some of my friends and I went and saw Piebald. [I had wanted to see them years ago, but was unable to find someone to go with.] When Kevin was telling Monica about the show she didn't know who Piebald was so he told her they were one of my favorite bands. I denied this. But about halfway through their set having already had a really good time and getting really into the music I realized that they were the closest to being one of my favorite bands I've seen since Saves The Day. I'll probably never see The Magnetic Fields or Regina Spektor, and the odds of seeing The Beatles aren't even worth mentioning.
anyway, tonight I had the idea to start making guitar bodies. I'm super excited about this idea. It combines two of my biggest loves: making things and musical instruments. I don't know if I'll end up making necks too. That seems much, much harder, but I suppose I'll try. I'll probably buy pre shaped and cut frettboards. Painting the guitars also seems a bit daunting. Its an opportunity to take existing designs and think "what would I have done differently?" and then do it and then to make things that I wish someone had made, but noone has ever bothered to make a production model out of. Anyway, I'll start with making a guitar, then probably make myself a jazz bass. After that I'll prolly make a few for some friends for the cost of the parts. WHO WANTS ONE? start thinking about what you want.
Also, I got new shoes. For working on the alligators for my mom. Speaking of which; the bust is almost complete!
It's really nice out. This past week has been freezing cold. 17 was a relatively nice day last week. Today, I went out without long underwear, without a wool coat, without a hat. This makes me happy.
Most of my friends at USM have all moved to Portland Hall. The result is that I can't just walk over to their dorms and hang out with them, I have to call them up, make plans to spend the night, then get on the bus and ride over. The result is that I spend entirely too much time with Kevin, Chelsea and Charle. Sure they're my friends, but I just see a little more of them than I should. Plus, they never party and rarely go out (they actually did go to Portland today, but neglected to invite me), so I'm getting fucking cabin fever. Nora broke her ankle last week, then moved into Portland Hall. So she can't drive, plus she's living with all those other friends, plus she has a new boyfriend, so the last person who visited me in Gorham is pretty much guaranteed not to do so anymore. I'd say the only way I'll be seeing her without going to Portland Hall for the rest of the year is if she pulls the same shit she did when she was with Jimmy: have her boyfriend drive her over to make me dye her hair, then leave me alone, sober and feeling used to go get drunk and have sex with her boyfriend. This makes me sad.
I need to go out. I need to party. I need to at least do something. I'm going crazy sitting in my dorm room any time I'm not in class.
But anyway, back to more pleasant subjects: Chris and I are playing one of our songs acoustically at the next Robie-Andrews Coffee House this Thursday with the help of Zebley on the other guitar. I'm excited. This is the first time we've played the song with a capable guitarist. It's amazing. The harmonies are complete! I get to sing! Plus, you generate so many new idea's just working with someone who know's their stuff.
My internet got taken away for two weeks because either Kevin or I got caught downloading something. Boo. Oh well.
My mom found a job listing that I'll be applying for, teaching [rock] music to young teens at a summer camp. Pays nicely. Seems awesome.
It seems these days all livejournal is ever used for is posting youtube videos. I'm looking at you, bald fellow with a Douglas Adams reference for a user name.
You know, that video (and the song too) for "Read My Mind" by The Killers has really won me over. At first mostly because Japan is such a pretty country from everything I've seen, and now I'm giving them another chance. I'm listening to their new CD. It's mostly crummy, just like their old one, but they have a few really good songs.
I've got a quite impressive first work study check coming some time soon. So to celebrate I'm going to spend over half of it on two new tattoos and an MP3 player; I just haven't really figured out the tattoos yet.
Chevin bought me some fancy lichee tea. Hurray.
I hate how snow forecasts always get toned down; if you look three days in advance they predict heavy snowfall from midnight to the early afternoon, but if you check a day later they predict light snowfall from midnight to dawn. But now I'm happy because now they've changed it to light snow all night and heavy snow all day. First Thursday night party of the semester for me!
Apparently from the subparbowl? Iunno, it's funny. Hurrah Goulet!
Anyway, I spent the night at Wade and Erin's last night. Dave and Janelle(sp?) and Mobsby were there. Then Erin and I talked about the restraunt business for a few hours. Then we talked about various aspects of life. I drank some cheap wine I actually enjoyed. We woke up and got breakfast, Erin freaked out because she was still drunk and was worried she'd get fired for spilling everyone's food. After watching some TV with Wade I walked from Portland Hall to the campus. It's weird, I live in the woods, but something about parks is just nice. I waited two hours for the bus then returned to Gorham. Abby and Dad drove down and picked me up. Abby and Mom say I should pay for college by modeling.
Ok, so for a while I had my heart set on an Epiphone archtop of some sort. At first I was looking at a Riviera, but then I played a Casino and enjoyed it, but then the issue with feedback worried me. I fell in love with the look of the Nick Valensi Riviera, but then they canceled the pretty color. For the past several months I've been planning to purchase a Fender Mustang, then customize the wiring. Well, just the other day I started seriously considering an Epiphone B.B. King Lucille. It's got a varitone, much like the Epiphone Jack Casady bass I'm in love with, so it comes with the ability to make multiple tones stock, which I was going to modify the mustang for. So right now it's mostly down to aesthetics. What it really all comes down to is which would I look best playing? Which would I look most unbelievably sexy playing? all facetious immodesty aside, which would be better, in all of your opinions? Please not that despite the pictures, the Lucille has a rather larger body than the mustang. For reference: that loser from the strokes playing a guitar similar to a Lucille some GUY playing a mustang
Also the other day; I thought of a posibility of how to accomplish that sort of branchy/viney half sleeve I've had an abstract image of stuck in my head. I was on Chris' new Saves The Day page and they have a new tattoo section, which had many pictures of the bird with stuff growing out of the cut in it's belly. I didn't know what this was from, so Nora informed me it was from the In Reverie album cover (Not actually buying CDs does unfortunately mean I usually miss out on album art). So I looked it up and I think it's an awesome image, cool art, and from a really good CD from one of my favoritest bands. So then I started thinking, I could possibly expand the viney stuff to wrap all over my arm. I'd want both the bird and the monkey. I could either place the bird on the inside of my arm and the monkey on the back, or the monkey on my back/shoulder (ooo unintended double meaning) and the bird on the back of my arm. I generally don't really like band tattoos, but Saves The Day has been one of my favorite bands for longer than any other band other than The Beatles.
Took a quiz earlier. Test in an hour. Rough draft due later today. Naturally I'm stressing which guitar to get.
Wow. Monica got dumped the other day. Then shortly after Kevin broke up with Chelsea. On one hand it sucks. They hurt. But then again, the tendencies of the number of couples seems to remain in a balance (in Better Than Andy I don't think there was ever more than two single people for a period longer than a week or two), so perhaps this could be a good omen for me? Probably not.
Monica is weird. Things she's looking for in a new boyfriend: Beard. Has a palm pilot. Has a switchblade. Sweats. Has goals.
I've been trying to throw a party but it's hard getting a sufficient number of people to attend. Or rather, it's hard getting a sufficient number of partiers to attend. My little Andrews crew is not really big on that sort of thing, so I need to import some fuel for the party, but they're all the type who have work and crap.
[ NOW ] Current mood: tired & bored Current music: John's crap. Current taste: chai Current hair: HAIR! Current clothes: jeans and a sweater Current annoyance: my eyeball hurts Current smell: thankfully nothing. Current thing I should be doing: building robots? Current windows open: no. Current desktop picture: Sheep. "mmmm" Current favorite band: Ladytron? Current book: Seymour, an Introduction Current cd in stereo: CD? Current crush: Orange soda? Current favorite celeb: Zooey Deschanel
[ DO YOU.. ] Smoke?: not anymore Do drugs?: is your mom a drug? Have a dream that keeps coming back?: nah Remember your first love?: tea! Still love him/her?: of course! Read the newspaper?: a little sometimes. Have any gay or lesbian friends?: yeah, but only close bi friends. Believe in miracles?: tea! Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: to tea! Consider yourself tolerant of others?: Depends? Differences: sure. Being annoying: no. Consider love a mistake?: nah Like the taste of alcohol?: depends on the beverage Have a favorite candy?: uuum.. sour patch kids Believe in astrology?: no. Believe in magic?: no. Believe in god?: no. Have any pets: yeah. Go to or plan to go to college: yes. Have any piercings?: no. Have any tattoos?: yes. Hate yourself: no. Have an obsession?: several. Have a secret crush?: little, maybe? Have a best friend?: yeah. Wish on stars?: yeah.
[ LOVE LIFE ] Ever been in love?: Nah. When did you lose your virginity?: August 12th, 1347 Do you believe in love at first sight?: Lust. Do you believe in "the one?": Neo? No. Describe your ideal significant other: Cute, silly, smart, childlike, creative.
[ETC] Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: besides "lets remove clothing!"? No. Have you ever been intoxicated?: der. Have you ever been caught "doing something?": define caught? Are you a tease?: No? Shy to make the first move?: Sort of. Alcohol is handy?
[ APPEARANCE ] Hair: been described as "Jesse Lacey-ish" Eyes: blue Height: 5'10".
[ LAST THING.. ] Bought: candy Ate & Drank: chai and humus and crackers. Read: Text book. Watched on TV: I saw Saw III tonight, but it was on a computer.
[ EITHER OR.. ] beer or cider: cider. drinks or shots: whatever. cats or dogs: harmony single or taken: single. pen or pencil: pencil gloves or mittens: gloves food or candy: food cassette or cd: cd. coke or pepsi: pepsi
[ WHO DO YOU WANT TO.. ] kill: jesus! get really wasted with: my friends look like: jesus! avoid: jesus!
[ LAST PERSON YOU.. ] saw: John, Laura, and Chris are in my room. talked to on the phone: umm... Geoff? hugged: Roger. instant messaged: Charle. kissed: a friend
[ HAVE YOU EVER.. ] Broken the law?: duh. Run away from home?: no. Broken a bone?: no. Played Truth Or Dare?: yeah. Kissed someone you didn't know?: yup. Been in a fight?: yes. Come close to dying?: a little?
[ WHAT IS.. ] Your bedroom like?: contaminated. roommate. Your favorite thing for breakfast?: bagel! Your favorite restaurant?: hmm.. Sabarro What's on your bedside table?: books, drugs, water. What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?: whatever I can find. What is your biggest fear?: SNAKES! SNAKES! except not really. Spiders. Describe your bed: Tall, red, nice. WOULD YOU CARE TO JOIN ME? It's cold when I'm alone. Spontaneous or plain?: spondiphorous. Do you know how to play poker?: Texas Hold 'Em. What do you carry with you at all times? my wallet, my phone, my chapstick. How do you drive? fairly well? What do you miss most about being little? eh. Are you happy with your given name? it's good. What color is your bedroom? here? white. it's a dorm. at home, gray and gray. Have you ever been in a play? not since elementary school. Do poor, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you? no. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person? in some senses, my sense of humor is sometimes mean.
Has anyone seen the movie Eulogy? I hadn't even heard of it before last night or whenever it was I watched it. It's amazing. And Zooey Deschanel; always pleasing. Anyway, one scene the lesbian little sister is really high and pauses half way through a story, forgets she's started telling it, then starts telling it again. Tonight Erin kept doing the same thing. She's cool, but I feel bad because I really didn't want to listen about how Chris got his screen name three times in a row.
I'm a little bummed because Wednesday night is supposed to be my night to party and hang out with my friends until all hours of the night and do various things that are probably against the law. But tonight Geoff was tired, and Nora was sick, and Mandy's car had been hit so she was gone and Derek left to be with her. And I spent most of the night sitting around trying to get in touch with someone. Sadly the highlight of my evening was severely wounding Kevin's pride by consistantly creaming him at tetris. Made one hundred dollars today. Hope to make another hundred tomorrow.
Ugh, I really hate this time of year. I was wondering what had got me down, just now I thought to myself "I hate this time of year" and then thought "well duh, no wonder I've been down, I always am." January and February are ugly and unpleasant.
I've had this strange feeling lately. Like something's wrong, or missing, I just don't know what it is. Maybe my ataraxia has met it's limit, and it's anxiety stemming from Friday. Maybe this unfamiliar feeling I encounter every now and again is actually anxiety or something. I sometimes wonder if my strange ability to just deal with life and take everything in stride has let me skip learning how to deal with stress and anxiety so when those things break through they have the potential to devastate me.
Japanese pop rock helps a bit though. Always fun.
Somehow just writing this down has made me feel a bit more at peace. Guess I'm still pretty well off.
Alright, I just just got the best homework assignment ever. Write a two chord folk song (those two chords being V and I of course) about the chords V and I. I've decided to play in the key of C, using the progression I V V I (C G G C). The assignment is to have a vocal melody with an accompanying harmony instrument (guitar). I'm going to do this then play the song again in G with organ and drums and maybe a melody guitar, and perhaps vocal rounds. I'm enjoying Music Theory II greatly, even after only 50 minutes. Even though the class is at 8 am.
The new gang (Monica, Chevin - being Chelsea+Kevin, Charle and I) went to Portland last night. It was freezing, but I was dressed warmly and it was great. Something about walking city streets makes my heart feel peaceful and content.
I have this plan to get a Fender Mustang and modify it. I plan on putting in humbuckers, turning one switch to a pickup switch (bridge, both, neck), and the other switch into a circuit switch; (coil tap, normal, treble cut). I'm also tempted to install a mute switch, and I'm debating whether I want single coil sized humbuckers, or full sized covered humbuckers. If I put in a mute switch or the full sized humbuckers the modifications will require a) enlarging the space in the wood under the pickguard and b) cutting the pickguard.
I got food poisoning. Bleh. Makes for a good excuse to watch lots of arrested development though. Bleh, still. Horrible stomach cramps and feeling like you could throw up at any moment for a whole day isn't really fun.
Chris and I have been recording. With a little luck we'll have another song and an interlude done by the end of vacation.
All these top records of 2006 things have been popping up, and I realize I've been doing an awful impression of a hipster this past year. I haven't kept up with new music at all. I spent this year mostly listening to David Bowie, The Beatles, Regina Spektor, and the music I listened to in 10th grade.
Charle picked me up yesterday and we drove to Rockland for Sammie's party in her unheated house. It turned out except for two half bottles of wine, my jagermeister was the only alcoholic beverage at the party except for a single bottle of champagne for midnight. Eventually Roger showed up with half a water bottle of whiskey and another one of vodka, but that didn't save my jager. I had enough to get a good buzz and made small drinks for everyone who asked for them, then I went into the living room, Charle and Kevin went to the kitchen and returned a few moments later with drinks, they claimed they were coke, but obviously weren't. Long story short, the next time I went to the kitchen I had 2 shots of jager left. So I sat around moping while everyone ran around yelling "I'M SHITFACED!" I did however, manage to apparently strike the fancy of Shannon, Kevin's very pretty best friend. Which, you know, is handy, considering I'm likely to never see her again. It was funny how I found out. A while after they left Charle got a phone call. We didn't know who it was or what it was about, but after a few heys and what's ups she started yelling "She wants to fuck him? SHE WANTS TO FUCK HIM?!" we all said "wtf" and laughed. Then she turned to me and said "What did you think of Shannon?" After my answer she went back to "So she wants to fuck him?" to which Kevin said "Well, no, she's a vir... very nice girl," and then I guess Shannon came out of the bathroom and started kicking Kevin's ass. Oh, also I met the guy Wade made out with when he was going out with Sammie.
My dad got a day pass and got to come home today. He's walking without his cane.
Tomorrow Chris, Me, and probably some others, are taking a trip down to the mall and picking up the stuff I left in my dorm room, and maybe stopping by Buck Dancers I hope. Then band practice.
My dad had a mini-stroke Tuesday morning affecting the function of his left arm and leg. Already he's doing much better and totally was able to grip a piece of paper today. Also today, he got moved to rehab, which is incredibly ahead of schedule. Abby was here yesterday, when they gave him Lorazepam, which fucked him up something fierce, and it scared the crap out of Abbs. But today he was doing quite well, and practically ran out of the room to catch the gurney to take him to rehab. His rehab is down in Portalnd at the MaineMed Brighton Ave Campus.
Dierdre and Jennifer are here for a few days too, to be with Dad and to help take care of my mom and the house.
Stuff that matters less!
I ended up returning home sooner than expected because a) the stroke, and b) Casey had forgotten previous plans and thus couldn't give me a ride home on Friday.
Sammie and Pinky (the college dropouts) returned to Rockland early this week. On the one hand, I miss Sammie. On the other hand life is much easier with her gone, what with all the annoying lust and such having left with her. Also I'm a little bummed because I was just starting to become friends with Pinky (the other night we were actually best friends, because I got up and brought her cookies from the other side of the room).
I have invites for two New Years Eve parties so far. One is Ben's. He has a new place apparently. And it's with all my friends from home. The other is at Sammie's. Two of my current bestest friends will be there, one of which I no longer have many opportunities to see.
For the past few days my thighs have hurt, in the same way muscles do after you get too much exercise. The first day I just assumed I had some sort of drunken dream that made me tighten my muscles, but I've been like this for three or four days so now I'm not so sure.
On a completely unrelated subject I want to produce a pair of underpants which have written on them: "If you can read this you should maybe stop going through my underwear drawer."
I've decided to be active in getting over her. She clearly doesn't really care about my feelings at all, so I'm going stop being a good friend and considerate and spend that energy finding someone new. Someone who never speaks in a southern accent and doesn't have stubbly armpits all the time and people don't call a 'whore' constantly not without basis.
and now for something completely different.
Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever on random Step 2: Post the first line(s) from the first 30 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song. (Note out name of song if in the first few lines) Step 3: No more than one entry per band Step 4: Let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from Step 5: Bold out the songs when someone guesses correctly Step 6: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING
1. Our house wrapped in disrepairs, a small mouse peeked out from a hole beneath the stairs
2. Hedge shapes narrowing, brain stored in the freezer, wind tops bellowing, it's a creeper double-feature
3. Oh show me the way to the next whiskey bar, oh don't ask why, no don't ask why
4. The kids were shouting let us out and their parents then two years then three years then show time now they're making rock and roll
5. you're standing in line for attention that you're never gonna get
6. when I'm a-walkin I strut my stuff
7. with your long blond hair and your eyes of blue
8. Clap your hands if you want some
9. Don't want to hang around anyone today, I'm sick of playing the same old games
10. Try to see it my way, do I have to keep talking 'til I can't go on?
11. Gotta clean my mouth out with soap, I gotta stop swearing
12. Start stop and start, stupid acting smart
13. Well I wanna chew my bubble gum with you, and I wanna walk you home from school
14. Come on inside, we've been waiting for you, well you're never on time, but we've forgiven
15. Our training's almost done, the graduation's near
16. We was walking through the park, trying to get home before too dark
17. Put the needle to the record, and hit me with your style, soon enough I'll learn to unload my mouth
18. No man of cloth, gonna go through my wallet, no mercenary, gonna make CIA
19. I love you my hard englishman, your love is like a fist in my womb
20. in the town of your youth, on some famous road or boulevard or lane
21. Oh no, I see, the spider web is tangled up with me
22. Since the start of the 17th century, there's been the scent of unseasoned wood burning in the air
23. Oh you, you walk on past, your lips cut a smile on your face
24. you know. you know. you see what's going on with me.
25. Don't waste your time running, I'm taking over the controls of your vessel
26. I wish I was smarter, I got so lost on the shore
27. I heard the news baby, all about your disease
28. Well, morning came and it dressed the sky in a lovely yellow gown
29. Never cared if I was acting dumb, never made me wanna hide and run, always took the time to ask what's wrong, never made fun of my favorite song
30. tell me about your love affairs, tell my about your moral resignations
I'm going to be amazed if even half of these get asked. I just checked. I have over 10,000 songs on my computer. I have some really obscure, esoteric shit that nobody ever bothers listening to.
wow, how can two people make an entire room REEK of morning breath or something in half an hour? Seriously, when I walked in the door it smelled like someone who hadn't brushed their teeth in a week because they'd been asleep the whole time was yawning in my face.
haha, I just found my mom's bowl. As well as her stash. I'm sure most people will say "so?" or "cool," but I find it rather amusing. It smells more like tea than the weed I normally smell.
So. I talked with my mom and basically it looks like I probably can't go to NYU next year. So basically I've got nowhere to go next year. Which means I'll probably end up doing like Dustin and living in Portland and working.
It'll be weird not going to school for the first time in my life. Although, maybe I'll be a part time student at USM. Take Music Theory III and an art class of some type. The nice thing I guess is if I just need to leave Maine, I wont have a several thousand dollar commitment holding me back, just a job and an appartment and friends. Friends can understand and friends can be visited.
Aside from the another-year-stuck-in-maine part, the thing that grosses me out the most is I'll need a car. I don't want a car. Oooooo! A VESPA! (or something similar)
I've gotta, gotta get through this alive, Alive. And even now I think I'll probably manage somehow to survive.
Is it still raining where you are? Is it still cloudy outside your window? Is it still raining where you are? Does it follow you everywhere you go?
This is comatose, Just let me out, Just let me out.
Anyway, Justin left his shitty keyboard and microphone and microphone stand at my house when he was going to be in the band. Then he came and got them before he went to jail. Thing is, he took my microphone instead of his own. I looked it up to see how much I lost and found out that his was actually more expensive and generally considered better, even though it's from the beginner line and mine's from the standard line. So I guess I won. But I kind of miss my mic. He did take my cord too. It was a long/quality cord, which translates to "it was expensive you son of a bitch!" so I might have lost the ten dollars I made there.
I'm listening to the new Brand New CD that came out the other day. I've have to tell you, I'm enjoying it. I don't normally really enjoy slow rock songs. That's not to say I don't like slow music, I just don't like the variety made by most rock bands. This CD is mostly pretty slow, but I like it. Also, at times it made me think of The Mars Volta, but I'm not sure why. Sowing Season (Yeah) and The Archer's Bows are Broken are my favorites right now.
Also, you should listen to Intimate Secretary and Level by The Raconteurs. And Escapist by Brandtson is my current addiction.
Simon & Garfunkel: "Me And Julio Down By The Schoolyard"
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Every now and then I write an entry that doesn't involve girls: so here's this I get two Thanksgivings because my last remaining uncle is coming for Thursday and Abby and Crew are coming for the weekend! Yay, free delicious food! Quorn and cope's corn and my world famous cranberry sauce and mashed potatoes and pie! And tomorrow I'm going over to Erin's for an early Thanksgiving. Perhaps after this week I wont look in the least bit gaunt!
Also, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I watched Pieces of April tonight. Which I wasn't expecting to be actually all that good. But it surprised me. And the soundtrack was nothing but The Magnetic Fields, so that was awesome.
I need to stop staying up so late. I need to call my advisor so I can sign up for classes. I need to get to writing lyrics. I need to buy sushi tomorrow. I might fail my test and with it the class, but dammit, I'm doing it with a belly full of my favorite food on earth, even if it is the crappy grocery store kind.
I might take some photos of my new hair tomorrow.
And on completely unrelated subjects: A lesson learned at Dustin's impromptu party on whatever night last week - "chick beer" is stupid. Got heartburn for the first time in my life. It looks like Chris is thinkin' of moving to New York in the only slightly distant future. Hoorah! One day we reform a duo of curly haired rockers who occasionally get mistaken for Jews.
I got a message from my mom today, in which she apologized. Which is not to say that she wasn't right. But I feel better none-the-less.
Here's a brilliant idea, Josiah; watch a love movie with the girl who you're trying to not accidentally fool around with anymore until early in the morning. Thank god for Charlé. It would not have surprised me if Sammie had gone for my bed instead the door, and it would not have surprised me if I hadn't kicked her out. But Charlé got rid of her.
Also, my roommate is retarded. It's 2am on a Tuesday morning. His girlfriend is sleeping in his bed. So naturally he comes in drunk to blast Jewel and talk loudly.
Ugh. I feel like someone else has been occupying my body for the past several days. It'd be really nice if I could just take back everything that has been said or done since Thursday.
It'd also be nice if my roommates would stop listening to Hillary Duff and From First To Last. Oh, and that new NFG song. It's bad.
Is broke my mp3 player. Charle got really drunk tonight. John Wayne is also very drunk. So drunk that he came into the room at 4 in the morning, started yelling, put on some music, ordered charle to wake up and dance with him. She didn't. So he turned to me, told me to dance with him, and when I told him I was reading he started to give me a shoulder massage. Anyway, I have a massive crush on Kimiko“Thunderbolt” Ross. Unfortunately she is not a real person.
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